I have been thinking about what I should write. Then I thought about why I should or should not write. I have a friend who writes really entertaining posts. They are always a hit. I have decided that I am just not that funny! I have also read posts that are depressing(I rarely read them again if every entry is depressing).
So, why do I do this blog? Is it for my own ego? Is it to record my own thoughts? I don't really write down a lot of my deep inner thoughts because well, they are just too personal for the world to have access to. I don't blog about all the disagreements and squabbles that we have around our house. That would be depressing. So--what to write and why?
This is just me rambling! I don't know why, I just do. I do think that it has to do with ego! It is a strange thing to put a bit of info out there and let strangers read it. Weird actually!
Today was the two older kids spring piano recital. #1 broke(or sprained) her middle finger at softball the other night-so she didn't perform. This did not hurt her feelings considering she puts the piano right up there in importance with cleaning the toilet. #2 did play one number and he did really well. He really could learn to play well if he actually would realize his ability and practice. I struggle to have them practice. It is often such a struggle that I just forget. I really want them to be able to read music and play for enjoyment. I would also like them to be able to play hymns well enough that if they were somewhere where noone played the piano they could do it.
I don't know how to get this generation to value anything that one has to really work at. I believe that we are rewarded extrinsically so often that we don't understand WHY we do something. I want for my children to understand that they do things because it is the right thing to do, it makes them feel good inside, they learn from it, it helps someone else. I want them to understand things intrinsically. That is MUCH more difficult than it sounds.
We are all motivated by extrinsic forces. Sad but true! I want to change that. I am trying to drink more water because I KNOW that it is better for my body. It is hard for me. I want to really exercise hard because it is good for my heart and body-not just because it will make my butt smaller!
Today my little #3 girl needed to clean her room. She is a little crazy girl! She is a little flighty. She gets distracted very easily(I wonder where she gets that?) So, I went into her room and we made a list about what she needed to do to clean up her room. Pick up books, pick up garbage, etc. etc. It was amazing how well this worked for her. I have done this before with her and I know that it is the best way to help her focus. What I did however, after she came to me and said she had crossed off everything on the list, I asked her how she felt when her room looked so pretty? She said good. I want her to know that it is nice to live in a clean place.Not just because Mom wants it clean but because she feels more at peace when it is clean and tidy. She was so proud of her clean bedroom that she had to show her cousin(who's Mom has won the Clean Mom of the year for the last 12 years running!) Now to really get it to sink in. Does this happen in a home that seems to be bursting at the seems daily? I try,I really do try to keep a clean house. I am very poor at keeping my children on task. Therefore, often they just don't think. They drop anything and everything.
Being constant is the key. I realize this. HOW TO DO IT 24/7? Anyone have any really effective ideas?
#1 is to get rid of all the junk. I am going to start working on this again. It is amazing how much better my pantry has been since I organized it. I have a little bit of tweaking in there and a few more labels and I will take a picture--it is working-which is a miracle!
#2 I think that responsibility is also important. I just fail miserably at this. Making everyone be responsible. They just think that I will do it--usually I do. It makes me grumpy. I want to be happy and feel joy in my home.When I am doing too much work I don't feel like the nice Mommy I want to be. So, it is MY JOB to figure out how to really get my children to feel responsible for themselves and their stuff.
How Do I get them to feel responsible?
Suggestions? Please feel free to comment!
1 comment:
This might seem counterintuitive, but stop reminding them to clean up. Let things get really gross. If they are used to a nice clean environment (maintained by you!), they'll eventually get grossed out enough by their own mess to clean it up themselves. Of course, you have to live with it until they do :)
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